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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23401288">safe</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/yasi/pseuds/yasi'>yasi</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>EastEnders (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Character Study, M/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 06:09:27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>656</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23401288</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/yasi/pseuds/yasi</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Ben knows in Callum’s arms he’s safe.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Callum "Halfway" Highway/Ben Mitchell</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>60</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>safe</h2></a>
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    <p>Safety is not something that Ben’s felt a lot in his life. His very short time with Paul is just another proof for that. At a very young age he’s learnt that no one and nothing is safe. He’s learnt that the people who are supposed to love and protect him are non-existent. He’s learnt not to trust anyone because they always end up disappointing him, even if they don’t mean to.</p><p>People who call him terrible names, who expect the worst from him forget all the abuse he’s went through, all the pain and suffering that’s turned him into what and who he is today. They tend to forget that a little boy was abandoned by all the adults in his life and left to fend for himself.</p><p>They wonder how he can be this awful person, hurting others, not caring about any collateral, and they forget about his mother faking her own death, his almost stepmother abusing him, his father beating him in alcohol induced hazes, his boyfriend being beaten to death. They don’t know half of it and that bit they do know? They don't care, because everybody’s had a hard life. He’s supposed to get over it, because that’s life. Right?</p><p>Well, he did. The only way he knew how, he became a horrible human being, only caring about his little family. And even they are fair game if need be, and he can’t be arsed to feel any remorse.</p><p>But then he walks into the Vic and there stands this tall and dark stranger with the bluest eyes Ben's ever seen. He only vaguely remembers the man but can’t put a name to him. And when he, Callum, shakes Ben’s hand and smiles, it’s like a spark’s been lit.</p><p>Ben doesn’t want to think about him, but there Callum is, appearing out of nowhere and invading Ben’s life. And if he were only a pretty face, Ben would’ve been able to forget him, fuck someone else and move on. But Callum carves out a place for himself in Ben’s life, attacks Ben’s walls with his sincerity, his genuine sympathy and Ben doesn’t know how to react. He’s not used to people being understanding towards him. He doesn’t know what to do with that, so reacts the only way he knows. He’s rude and sarcastic and hurtful.</p><p>But Callum persists, whatever Ben throws at him, he’s still kind and patient and Ben’s walls are slowly crumbling. And Ben fights with everything he has against it, he doesn’t want to let anybody in. Callum will disappoint him, like so many people before him.</p><p>He’d like to think of himself as strong and he definitely is good at pretending to be strong. But he knows, deep down, that he’s fragile. He has a bruised and broken heart hidden beneath a steel cage, locked away in his scarred chest. And he won’t let Callum in.</p><p>But Callum is an opponent Ben’s underestimated, because he finds a way to Ben’s heart that Ben didn’t know existed. He makes his way silently into Ben’s affections and nestles there. And without Ben’s knowledge, something starts growing, dismantling Ben’s defences. And one day Ben realises he's in love.</p><p>He won’t admit it, but Callum’s won, made a place for himself in Ben’s heart and Ben can only watch helplessly. Slowly losing control. </p><p>Callum is everything Ben’s wished for when he still believed in fairy tales. He is a tall, strong and handsome prince, good-natured and kind-hearted. Always ready to lend a helping hand. And he loves Ben unconditionally.</p><p>And when Callum holds him, closes his strong arms around Ben protectively, Ben feels at home. He feels at peace. When Ben buries himself in Callum’s arms, the world disappears, and he can breathe again.</p><p>Normally, everything in Ben would scream to run away and hide, but Ben knows in Callum’s arms he’s safe. There is no better place to be.</p>
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